The Adventures of Catman and Sassy

One day, i thought i saw... a niraaj. bt it turns out, to be stans with his 200 pound hair. He was on the set for the new pantene commercial. before and after commercial that is. so, i walked over and meowed. ..translation: hey there, yeah, u! the guy with the tragic hair do. he turned at me, and i saw... a flea the size of a dinner plate. "Am i TAT hungry?", i thot to myself. maybe i am. coz i feel like eating him. if only he's not 99% hot gas. bt then again, hot gas is better than catfood for the 5th year in a row. but that catfood is wayyy better than niraaj.

so anyway... as stans walked over to me, i purred. he was startled bt yet, he was GAYly happy. and that freaked me out. I thot to myself again, "i'd rather hv niraaj than a gay meal. bt then again, who is to say niraaj is straight". not bryan, thats for sure. or adrian. Ok, tis whole gay thing is dwelling too deep in my stomach. It's making me lose my appetite. just like how i lose my appetite when i saw jaya walking around. or jaja or jabba or....nvrwnd, u get my point. i guess..

Tat gay face of stans made me purred the other way round, swinging my synthetic tail which i bought at 20 sen discount store the opposite way. From north to south. NORTH TO SOUTH!! so in the end, catman misses another meal for the day. Then i thot, " wait. i cud seek help from the fair maiden who leaves at jalan patingan, SASSY".

so i used my bird call to call sassy. oops, i mean my cat call. Sassy turns out to be deaf to cat call. How ironic. My cat call at least. so i tried out a different cat call. with a higher pitch. higher than the value of bryans iq level. ( mind u he has quite a high iq level) ((bt ntg cn beat his ego level.)) ( its the value of his iq level to the power of 6)

Nyways, back to the never-ending story, sassy eventually went out. to shit on the yard tat is. Oh well, gud enuf. so im all by myself to face the wrath of stans gay face and the gigantic flea of his. a two against one fight. The stench of sassy's fresh poop filled my lungs and stans gills. so as stans was gasping for hydrogen.... i realised, the gas from sassy's poop cn be used as a deadly weapon against stans. so i took my chance and kick him in the balls. Yes ppl, he has balls (not sure whether i shud use plural form in tis one).

so stans was screaming like a maniac who missed his therapy sessions. or like a hippy in an emo convention. turns out, to my horrror, stans was screaming in pleasure. i thought to myself " how desperate could this bozo be. why dont he just book niraaj every saturday night or go to a gay fest or something". So as he was in his gay-mode, i grabbed a pawful of sassy's shit and stuffed it in his hair. mind u that his hair also act as his mouth. DIG IN STANS!

so yes, finally, he was defeated in the match of hot stinking gases. GASES!! The kingdom of hot gases is nw taken over by sassy's poop. hail the new king!! and they all lived happily, stinkily ever after. by using a gas mask of course.

THE END

Writer's note: stans, i love u man. u knw tis is hw we roll. niraaj for the love of god..be straight!! and bryan... have fun spreading ur sarcasm. and sassy u have one stinking master u know that!!

written by: me and my sidekick, chewy. long live macbooks...haha she said that.